Yesterday was monumental for me.
I got to ring the chemo bell!
I've been waiting for months to finish my scheduled chemo treatments and ring that bell!
And ring it I did! All around the infusion center!
As amazing as it was, I still live under a cloud of uncertainty, which clouds my joy.
Next Wednesday I have a series of scans and doctor appointments to figure out the next steps.
First, the breast MRI to determine how big the lumps in my breast are now.
We know they've shrunk by feel, but that's not an exact science.
Second I meet with the radiation doctor. He determines the course of radiation.
Third I receive a CT scan on my liver. This is the source of my anxiety.
If there are liver lesions that have not been killed by the chemo, I will need more.
Chemo is hard. I have been on a very aggressive regimen and it is painful and debilitating.
I had myself set up mentally to endure the prescribed course, and I just don't want any more chemo!!
I am hoping and praying that the liver lesions are gone and I will be able to go forward.
I know that radiation and surgery won't be pleasant either, but they will be the next step.
More chemo feels like I'm stuck. Like I'm not as close to being well and healthy and strong.
I know that my timetable is not the same as the Lord's.
I have learned before that His ways are not my ways, and His ways are best.
But I still pray that our wills meet up with no more chemo.
Please pray my friends. I have never met more faith and love than before this trial.
Your support has kept me going and is more important to me than you will ever know.
XOXO
Jaime
